What is your idea of perfect happiness?
I don’t have one.
What is your greatest fear?
Which living person do you most admire?
What is the trait you most deplore in others?
What is your greatest extravagance?
Custom-painted orange wheels on my white Audi station wagon.
What is your favorite journey?
Oman: Muscat and the Wahiba Sands.
On what occasion do you lie?
I avoid lying, because I’m not good at it.
Which living person do you most despise?
My personal shit list is zeroed out right now.
Which words or phrases do you most overuse?
In print: ostensibly and perhaps. Aloud: dude and fucking.
What is your greatest regret?
Pulling back and not going on one particular heavy wave in the winter of 2009.
Where and when were you the happiest?
At the birth of my son.
What is your current state of mind?
Woolgathering. Paranoid about seeming lazy. Anxious about time.
If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
I would want more artistic confidence.
What do you consider your greatest achievement?
Writing my second novel, Panorama City.
If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be?
A beloved cat named Whiskers.
What is your most treasured possession?
My newest surfboard.
What do regard as the lowest depth of misery?
The piped-in music at our local Ralph’s, a grocery store.
Where would like to live?
What is your favorite occupation?
What is your most marked characteristic?
An inability to keep so-called inappropriate thoughts inside my own head.
What is the quality you like most in a man?
Intelligence, sense of humor, language, taste.
What is the quality you like most in a woman?
Intelligence, sense of humor, language, taste, flirtability.
Who are your favorite writers?
Nabokov, Proust, Hrabal, Nicholson Baker, Pynchon, Thomas Bernhard, Cheever.
Who are your favorite heroes of fiction?
Franz-Josef Murau, Arno Strine, Jesus, the Cat in the Hat.
Who are your heroes in real life?
My wife. After that the list is always in flux: James Alan McPherson, Yves Klein, Tom Curren, Gabriel Orozco…
What is that you most dislike?
The sound of someone smacking their lips while eating.
How would you like to die?
I’d like to know I’m dying and be able to say a few words about it first.
What is your motto?
Seize the daybed.